What I Expect From Myself

I expect myself to exercise more discipline over my own creative and professional endeavors.

I expect myself to honor my daily commitments, to recognize that carving out an hour for myself and me and O is not a luxury. It's vital.

I expect myself to sit down and write out the "five-year plan" (oy. I need a better term. I shrivel in the face of that) and then work backwards, figuring out what needs to happen within three, two, years, one year, six months, six weeks, etc.

Seriously, that would be such an achievement. And there are many options! It's not a prescription. It's a blueprint. Right now, I don't even have the blueprint, yo. Let's get on that.

So, yesterday we made a last minute switch to an asynchronous day because the campus was closed until 11 am. It was the right decision to make, and Team Lyra rocked it out in under an hour, but we still made a couple of errors--I didn't change the Tuesday at 8 pm deadline on the Gladstone DB in two sections. Super confusing. It happens, but it sucks that it happened on the first Monday that got changed around last minute.

Last night on the Gdrive to do list (often referred to as just 'the doc'), K and A and I were talking about reaching out to students who seem a little unsure so far. The ones not logging in much, not turning in assignments, etc. A suggested mandatory TA meetings and went into action mode, showing us a GDrive spreadsheet that students could use/ sign up for times, etc. K and I were totally on board; students need to have their 3 Topics memo Tuesday, so this sounded good. Then CB came on and was like "whoa, wait. what? It's been like one freaking day." She argued that if we had "hey, are you okay" meetings right now, students would resist big time. Also, if we told them tomorrow that they had to meet with their TA the next day? That's kind of a lot.

So, we're going to do that next week, but here's the thing:

I think that the way to spend more time on the LPs tomorrow, which corresponds with the 3 Topics Memo, which justifies the TA meeting, is to...okay, well I don't know how, actually. I want to approach it in a rich, good, yummy way, not a logistical "3 papers. Decide by Tuesday. Meet w/ your TA." You know? Besides we spent a fair amount of time talking about them on Day 1. That's all Day 1 was, really--logistical stuff, not fun stuff. The Discussion Boards are so rich--I want to build on THAT energy in class, not revert to logistical yawn-y stuff.

But I'm not sure *how* to do that. Maybe I can dig something out of WA Ch 2 that they read for tomorrow. To make time for this (and to not alienate all of them), I'm cutting the quiz until Monday. I really have to quiz them Monday, but tomorrow is too icky. It would be a pop quiz, and yesterday was really confusing for many of them, they're all still getting their bearings, etc. So, no quiz. We'll start with some rich discussion questions on the board for pre-class, get into those, reference Monday's DBs...then get into the activity...then, if possible, attribution exercise...Monday logistics, LPs and TA Meeting.

Okay. Get this to the doc and the lesson plan. Catch up on email/ working docs/ action items. Note that beginning Friday, no 101 stuff until after 12 noon. I have earned and must protect my own writing time.

What I Expect from Students

The first day of classes was Wednesday. As usual, I was uber excited the night before, collating syllabi, ironing a blouse...I get all kinds of excited the day before I meet all of my new students. All of my classes are in the same room, back to back, in a building adjacent to my building. Where my office is. Total. Bliss. I don't even care that the room is windowless and cramped. It's fine. The room has little tables instead of desks--tables that seat two students each. That's cool, too; desks are bulky. We can move the tables around easily, which means that for group work, students have to face each other: two tables pushed together = groups of four with students facing each other. We'll do that this Wednesday.

The first day was more organic than usual: I started with student expectations and questions and simply answered everything as it came up. The thing I didn't do, unfortunately, is give a good "gestalt spiel" about how awesome the course is, what they will learn as long as they apply themselves, etc. I didn't emphasize that they are all walking in here with a diverse set of strengths and that they will be learning as much from each other as they do from me and the TAs. That the objective of this course is to empower themselves to be able to do all of this independently by May 8. While I did emphasize that I front load the course and that the next six weeks are intense, I didn't clarify what this weekend's readings are about or that they need to be checking Canvas pretty much daily.

Apparently, many other professors have not completely set up their course sites because they feel as though they didn't have enough time or training to do so. Because of this, my students may not be in the habit of checking ELMS daily yet. They need to, though.

One of my opening questions to everyone--this was the first one, actually--was what their expectations were for the course. This, plus a few other questions, made for a five minute freewrite that they then shared with their neighbors. I went around from pair to pair and asked each pair for an expectation and a question. At some point in the second section, one student asked me: "What do you expect from us?"

*blink*

I know that I paused; I started replying but then stopped and said, "hold on. I need to figure out how I want to articulate this." I was struggling with what I struggle with in my syllabus and pretty much all the time: I have high expectations. I expect a lot from you guys because I know what you're capable of. But I also expect that you have full lives and need to prioritize; I can't expect you to be rock stars all the time. Furthermore, I expect that most of you probably don't think you need to work as hard as I'm warning you you do...which is complicated by the fact that I'm trying not to scare you too much on the first day. I think I said something about the fact that most of them are probably used to getting As on everything, and some of them haven't had to work that hard to do so. I know I followed that up by saying that I don't make the course rigorous to somehow make up for that, as though I'm trying to make up for easier teachers in the past. But that it will be hard. But that...

I think that the first thing I should have said--I know I said this at the end, but as more of a throw away--was that I expect them to read. I expect them to do their homework. The worst classes are the ones that I've carefully designed as a follow up to the homework and then realize that no one has done the homework. It's a complete waste of time--for all of us. If you don't do your job, I can't do mine well.

So, I've been thinking about this a lot over the past couple of days, and have come up with the following. Some of it I said in class, some of it I didn't. All of it, I believe, is doable.

1. I expect you to read the assigned readings. Reading is not a passive activity. If you just read the readings once, quickly, without taking notes, you're not going to remember any of it. Then you'll have to reread them, which cuts into the amount of time you have to write. The readings are carefully selected to help you write your papers. If you don't read, your papers won't meet the expectations of the prompts and, consequently, this course.
2. I expect you to give me and this class the benefit of the doubt. That is, I expect you to be open to the possibility that this course might be awesome. For many students, it is. 
3. I expect you to understand that you reap what you sow. If you approach the class with an attitude of resistance, you're probably not going to like it. It takes as much energy to have a bad attitude as it does to stay on top of your game. The class is more useful if you do the latter.
4. I expect you to meet me halfway. I do everything I can to make this class productive and worthy of your time. I tailor each class to students' needs. If you tell me you want to work on conclusions, we'll work on conclusions. We'll do that by writing in class. If you decide you don't feel like working on conclusions and would rather whisper to your neighbor or daydream, then don't be surprised when your conclusions don't improve. If you tell me you want to improve your vocabulary, I'll incorporate vocabulary into the curriculum. If you choose not to learn those words, don't complain when I call on you to use those words in a sentence, quiz you, or take points off your papers for wordiness or informal diction.
5. I expect you to read intelligently, effectively, and well. You're in college. You will read a lot. The way you approach reading has an enormous impact on your comprehension and, consequently, your time. Read the reading handout on Canvas for how to read effectively. 
6. I expect you to work on your writing daily. Writing is a skill that requires conscious effort to improve. Athletes train. Musicians train. Writers train. You're in training for college-level writing.
7. I expect you to treat this course on a standard 5-day workweek schedule. In here, that schedule is usually Sunday through Thursday. In order to do well in this course, you must work on the homework before Sunday night. 
8. I expect you to view me, your TAs, and each other as allies. We will help you. We're more effective at doing so when you identify what you need and ask us for assistance. One good strategy for figuring out what you need is taking notes when you do your homework. When you are stuck or confused, make a note of it and ask us. We won't know what you need if you don't ask. You won't know what you need if you don't do the work.
9. I expect you to push yourself. Learning occurs when you work through challenges, not when you shirk them. If you push yourself to work even just a little harder than usual, you will be pleasantly surprised at how much you learn in this class.
10. I expect you to do your homework. See all of the above.

#TeamLyra

Why have I yet to publish this blog?

Because I don't post enough. That's all. A blog is useless if it isn't updated frequently. So, this is on my daily to do list, as is Twitter (way easier), as is working out. The idea is that if I start with even just a ten minute blog post, I can then transition into non-101 writing time...

We'll see. The writing time trumps the blog, but the blog can act like a freewrite. A warmup. And I need to keep priming the writing pump lest the well run dry.*

*The well is never dry. It's just getting the water up regularly. Examine mechanics of this to make the prose pretty.

SO: I have been ensconced in 101 all week. 10-14 hour days every day. I've officially taken today (Saturday) off--I'm even cutting dance class. And I'm okay with this. I'm taking care of me. Dance class is taking care of me, but today, it's sunny, I didn't go to bed until 4:30, and I crave time on the home front. Cleaning, organizing, creating. Doing tangible things. Visible things. Stuff with my hands. Clearing clutter is as important to semester prep as miniscule format changes on the course site.

At the same time, I feel as though all of my work this week has been quite helpful; I've pretty much finished Nilson's Teaching at its Best (on top of her Graphic Syllabus)  and O'Brien et al's The Course Syllabus: A Learning-Centered Approach. All excellent, and all have helped me improve my syllabus, especially the grading and evaluation sections. Students have the right to know on Day 1 exactly how homework is counted and how much quizzes contribute to the preparation grade. It's only been since I've started working with TAs that these details have been hammered out, and it's taken two semesters to get it right. Having TAs look over the syllabus, too, has been invaluable (how did I not do this last semester?!) To that end...well, I could go on a big thing, but I think that after the initial stages of college teaching prep, many instructors don't share their syllabi with each other, which is a shame. Too much of this profession's standard modus operandi still seems to be solitary. I have no idea what other instructors do, and am always asking my TAs to share their other syllabi with me and to let me peek at their course sites for other courses. I crave this stuff. Maybe it's different at other institutions, but even with the support of the program and department, I still don't feel as though we have easy ways of collaborating, or even just sharing ideas. We have an instructor's website for 101...but I think it's underutilized. How could that be improved?

Anyway, a couple of things I made and added are graphics, and they're just lovely. I have three: one of the major assignments, one of how the learning outcomes correspond with the assignments, and one of the weekly progression of the linked papers over the course of the semester. This last one I think will help a lot, though it's only a table. A more dynamic chart would be better, I'm sure. The learning outcomes one in particular I'm most proud of, as it's forced me to figure out how, indeed, the program's learning outcomes fit with all of the major assignments. Here's what I came up with:

I love it. I actually redid it all in Word, not Powerpoint, and it's even sexier because the assignments are staggered, showing how they overlap with each other, chronologically over the semester.  I couldn't get that one to transfer over to here, so this will have to do. I think this will help students a lot. It certainly helps me, anyway.

Here are the assignments:

And here is the linked papers progression:

Progression of Linked Papers by Week:

Week 1: Introduction of Linked Papers and Course Themes
Week 2: Exploring Topics
Week 3: Narrowing Topics, Inquiry, Research
Week 4: Inquiry, Research	Conferences w/ TAs
Week 5: Evaluating and Synthesizing Sources, Drafting
Week 6: Reviewing and Revising
Week 7: Defining Debate, Research		Paper 1 Due March 6
Week 8: Choosing Stasis, Determining Audience and Purpose	Conferences w/ Lyra
Week 9: Research, Audience, Purpose, Structure, Drafting
Week 10: Reviewing and Revising
Week 11: Inquiry Process and Research Summary/ Proposal		Paper 2 Due April 10
Week 12: Choosing Stasis, Research, Structure
Week 13: Drafting, Style, Revision
Week 14: Reviewing and Revising
Week 15: Linked Papers Summation, Semester Reflection		Paper 3 Due May 8

Nice, huh? I guess it would be better to have a horizontal bar graph...but whatever. Just having any graphic is helpful, I think, and the three papers are color-coded, which is nice. This semester, I'm fighting for Paper 2 to really come in on Week 11 so that we have more time for Paper 3. This is vital, especially for the Fall semester, because Thanksgiving is a hard interruption for the Paper 3 trajectory. So, in order to make this happen, I've pushed Paper 2 up; in order to do that, I've split the rhetorical analysis into four individual assignments--small ones. Maybe one of them can be a group thing...I don't know. I don't really care. They do plenty of group work. What I care about is that the summaries and RAs are about the LP topics; they are mini assignments that, in their own way, feed the papers. 

Duh.

Every semester, I find myself pitying all students in previous semester. Ah! Why didn't I do it this way before?! But that comes with the territory, I guess. And plenty of my former students did just fine, graphics or no. 

Speaking of rock star students: #TeamLyra13 has been phenomenal so far!! Every time I put something on the to do list, it's done within hours. I can hardly keep up with them. They ROCK. We recorded and published the "How To Use Conferences and Collaborations in Canvas" video in under four hours, and I even made them five short videos on "Playing with Canvas 101" so that they could watch them and do it on their own time. Far, far more efficient than trying to do it live. I have Part 2 coming tomorrow (Modules and Assignments), as well as the Welcome Video for the site. This is important--several students are already looking around the site, and I claim that a video is coming soon...I'll make it tomorrow, after I've gotten the recent items up (add grading/ evaluation pages plus the LP progression graphic). Scan remaining HW and get that set for Day 1, too, for wicked eager students.

Okay. I'm seriously taking the rest of the day off. I'm going to make curtains now (oy...)

Post its and Publications

"When I Have Your Wounded" has been accepted by War, Literature, and the Arts!!! 

I got the email Wednesday afternoon. I'm so grateful! Ecstatic! Elated, even!

But of course, there's a flip side. It's the essay about my dad as a Medevac pilot in Vietnam...and I use his name. And I quote a letter he wrote detailing some of his most unfathomable experiences. It's personal. It's hard material.

And he has no idea that I've written it. He knows that I wrote the 9/11 piece, but has no idea that I spent  a good eight months on this one, researching Medevac history, figuring out what it takes to fly a helicopter (both arms and legs. Who knew? They're incredibly complex. And temperamental. I'm still awed when I think about them and my dad flying them at 19...in a war zone. While getting shot at. I now have the bullet that grazed his ear.), realizing how highly lauded they were/ are by those that worked with Medevac pilots and, of course, those whose lives were saved.

I need to call him and ask permission. I reread it last night and cringed as I realized how much is in there. It's not even just the excerpts of the letter--it includes names of men he worked with and opens with two pages--maybe 400 words or so--of him growing up and learning to read the water and weather. I name the town, provide narrative detail. All of it. Even if I change his name, anyone who knows him will know it's him.

The whole essay puts him in a favorable light, if not on a pedestal. But it's still one of the worst years of his life. And people react in really surprising ways when they're written about; even the most benign narrative detail can be offensive. I'm terrified to call him, but I have to.

I won't retract it. I'll change his name. That's it.

Think good thoughts, please.

In other news, I've been working nonstop on my syllabus, course objectives, course website, etc. I'm wicked excited. Here are some shots from the last 24 hours:

Okay. Call dad. Then back to work.

Productivity

Yesterday was ridiculously productive!

Scratch that: I was ridiculously productive.

• Handled the incomplete. Waiting for a response.
• Played with Canvas, which involved the course site I was building to be deleted. That's okay. What's more important is that I have three separate course sites for each section and that my TAs have been added to the courses.
• Worked out. Core synergistics. I'm so not in the shape I will be soon. 
• Scheduled Team Lyra meeting
• Wrote evaluations for all eight Fall12TeamLyra TAs. That took forever, but it's done, and they were fairly easy to write. There were notes to myself along the way regarding how to be a better manager. I try. I really do. But I can always improve.

Also continued tearing through Linda Nilson's Teaching at its Best. Learning outcomes. I need to better clarify my learning outcomes...and make a graphic representation of them. I like visuals. This will be cool. She's the queen of graphics; I also have her The Graphic Syllabus and Outcomes book. Maybe I should look in there for more on outcomes maps today.

Also Today:

• Write scripts. Like right now.
• Keep tooling away on Canvas and with syllabus/ outcomes. And maybe schedule, but that's drafty at best right now. Oh, I had an idea about the Summary...maybe the sample this semester can be the classwork from last semester, and the current students can summarize 35-56? But I really like using Gabriel...also, if we do use Gabriel, have the discussion be on a Wednesday so that the SHC rep can come in on that day.
• ^ Shoddy sentence structure.
• I have a bunch of other random things on my list. Cleaning the house should be on there, too. But right now, I just want to work. Peace out.

Seize the day

To Do Today (seriously):

• Draft Action Plan for Incomplete
• Note: please do anything in your power to avoid incompletes. Please. This particular case is understandable; it may well be the only incomplete I've granted willingly. But it's still a major challenge for all parties involved.
• Clarification: I am happy to grant and work with this incomplete
• N.B.: I abhor incompletes. 
• Play with Canvas
• Build welcome pages
• Build Outcomes
• Draft Outcome Map
• Write evaluations for last semester's TAs
• No, but like really
• Write scripts for Drive and Hangout videos
• Schedule Hangout with Team Lyra tomorrow
• Workout
• Make curtains
• Make Lovelocks: New one, Raven, Maia
• Sing through the day in deep, blissful gratitude
• Seriously